The Boob Tube:
Do they still call it that? Or should I say the strapless top? (It is a little more sophisticated but doesn’t roll off the tongue in quite the same way.) Well it’s tubular in shape and sure enough my boobs are inside it; so I’ll go with boob tube. How fancy.
A huge fan as a child, I had a real affinity for tight tops in general; really really tight tops. – The less fabric the better. – (Inspired solely by a variety of female 90s Pop Stars). Sometimes I’d purposefully wear tops I knew were too small, just to show off my stomach; I felt this was very cool indeed.
It’s a little different now I have a child of my own. I’d never go out in public showing any kind of skin around my midriff.How inappropriate. I’ve risen above that. (Lies; I happen to be very proud of my post-baby body and shall continue to flaunt it at every opportunity). -The boob tube; not that opportunity. Here’s why I no longer wear them:
1.) Gravity. Tug. Tug. Tug.
2.) Bra straps. – Specifically not-so-sexy M&S Nursing Bra Straps, but in general let’s keep bra strap sightings to a minimum; it is just not lady like. (Unless colour of bra matches colour of tube, in which case carry on).
3.) I’m not seven.
4.) Sizes of boobs in relation to size of tube.
5.) I live in T-Shirts now. They’re so much sexier…
Pretty enthusiastic about my hand gestures here… I have no recollection of what I was trying to achieve with this move..My right hand couldn’t even level with my left..
Look #68: Orange Boob Tube – H&M, Shorts – Miss Selfridge, Blue Sweatshirt and Blue cardi – Topshop, Shoes – New Look, Chunky Bracelet – Forever 21, Necklace – Dorothy Perkins.