CONFESSIONS · LIFE

Confessions of a Single Mother: Containing My Joy

GETTING MY BOOB BACK

Maia is now just over two and a half. I cannot believe THREE is fast approaching. Three seems so much older than two, three is not a baby anymore. Baby or not I am still breastfeeding the little madam. (From one boob, it’s all very lopsided and wonderful). We share a brief moment each day where I gaze into her big blue-green eyes and I’m taken back to when she was newborn and it seemed like I spent my entire existence with her at my nipple. I keep meaning to wean her but she seems to love it so. The health visitor said to do it when I was ready. And I have to say, I thought I was ready, but now I’m not so sure. It’s not easy. I am aware I’ll have to stop eventually. I don’t want to be the mother that breastfed her daughter till she was seven. People do that. And that’s great for them.- Whatever works. I have nothing against it, unlike a lot of people, I don’t think it’s weird. But at some point this year, I want my boob back for good…More on this later.

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Here we are doing our thing…

LITTLE OLD LADIES

Going out and about with Maia gets more and more interesting the older she gets. We get a lot of little old ladies approaching us in supermarkets. I love it. It goes a little like this:

“How old is she?”

“Two” *proud smiles*

“And what’s her name?”

“Maia” *more proud smiles*

“Ah what a lovely name, isn’t she beautiful! Hello Maia!”

Maia: “NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!” *expression of pure outrage, looks away* 

“Oh.. right then…*some polite remark from the old lady about her innocence and right to protest*” 

*old lady walks away*

“Oh Maia, she was only trying to say hello..”

“NO Mummy! NO hello!” 

This happens a lot. Sometimes she says hello back and even offers a sweet smile, other times she just looks at me in pure disgust. I get it. Humans can be irritating. Especially when you’re just walking around, minding your own business and suddenly you’re approached by a very amiable little old lady, telling you how beautiful you are. – How awful…

HOW MUCH PEE 

“Yes yes yes!! Well done you clever girl! I am so proud of you! High Five Mummy!!!” – My words of delight as Maia used her potty for the first time last night. There was a genuine sense of excitement; I couldn’t wait to see how much she’d peed. Overcome with pride; I felt like messaging all my nearest and dearest with photographic evidence of the pee itself, all within the parameters of the potty, she’s got good aim. – But I thought perhaps this was too far, better to keep my daughter’s triumph in my head and not on other people’s camera roll. I contained my joy.


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