“That’s why revolutions happen because people are energised by change and that’s where we need to get to somehow. People who are at least energised to change the government, please! “
A continuation of this interview with Emma Cantrell MBE:
11.) How do you feel your work has influenced your parenting?
My poor children have been volunteers for my charity since the charity started. It’s so part of their lives that it got to October and Wilbur was like “So when are we going to set up the Christmas shop?”, like it’s part of his job!
On a deeper level, I hope that I’ve instilled in them a level of gratitude that perhaps other children don’t have. If I can do one thing it’d be that they understand their privilege.
12.) A book(s) you think everyone should read?
The book which really inspired me to start my charity is called Hard Work by Polly Toynbee. She wrote this book where she went and immersed herself in living on a low-paid job in a council property, as if she’d just lost everything and moved into this place. I found that really life-changing in terms of how I thought about First Days and the work that we’re doing and what it means.
My favourite ever book is Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier. I don’t know why it’s my favourite book, it has no real meaning, it’s just a book that I read about once a year and I just love it.
1984 is a really important book and I can’t wait for my children to read that and see the dystopian world we now live in reflected in that book.
This is such a cliché because everyone says they love Les Misérables, or they hate it, but I actually read the book as a teenager. The play in its purest form has all the themes, love, compassion, empathy, grace over law, there are lines in that which are just so profound. I absolutely love the idea of revolutions as well. “Do you hear the people sing..”. Come on speak up people!
Without becoming ridiculously philosophical; one of the big problems in our society at the moment is that we’re so tired and so apathetic because we’re so tired. Everyone I know is exhausted, especially if you’ve got young children, working really hard. Everything is full-on 24/7 and it’s caused us to stop caring about the big things because you’re just exhausted by all these expectations, all these small things and I think that’s so dangerous.
If we can step back and look at what is important. That’s why revolutions happen because people are energised by change and that’s where we need to get to somehow. People who are at least energised to change the government, please!
13.) What makes you most angry?
My friend Haley says to me, “no one cares as much as you do”. Loads of people are really generous and brilliant, lots of people do care. But I think when people are just so selfish, and they’re okay and they will happily say “Well, I’m alright… Why would I help you?” That’s what gives me the most rage. And I think the other thing is, when people won’t approach things with an open mind. I love looking at a belief I have and thinking:
“Where does that fit now with where I’m at, what I’ve learnt and how I’ve grown. And actually, I’ve changed my mind.”
One of the most powerful things I think you can do is say, “I used to think this and now I think this”. And I think when people are unwilling to do that, so closed minded. I find that very, very difficult.
And I think it comes from a fear. “I am safe in this belief system. I don’t want to know about what’s going on over there, because it might destabilise this very safe world that I’ve created.” Which I can’t get my head around.
14.) What would you tell your 15 year old self?
I think I’d tell her to chill out, like calm down. I think I always felt I would grow out of feeling different, like one day I’ll wake up and I’ll feel like I fit in, I’ll feel like I’ll have this nice group of friends that I understand..Cos everyone seemed to understand each other..
I think I’d actually tell her: feeling like that is okay, it’s not going to change, so you’re going to have to get used to it, and it’s fine. And it’s actually a superpower. It’s a really important part of who you are.
I think at fifteen, all I wanted to be was someone different. I wanted to look different, have a different brain, do different things. Looking back, that was a pretty awesome fifteen year old; seeing that would have been nice at the time. I think that it’s okay to feel how you’re feeling; it’s really normal and you’ll find loads of people who feel the same as you eventually.
15.) Three things you’d like to do or achieve in your lifetime?
I definitely want to live by the sea, another cliche, but I just love water, I’ve heard that creative people are drawn to water. Or just by a body of water. A lake would do. A river frontage would be fine! I love amazing views and I’ve always had a view of a hedge or a brick wall out of my window. I’d love to live somewhere that has nice views.
I’d love to see if I could write a book. I have a really short attention span so I feel like it would be a massive achievement if I managed to write a book cos it feels like it’s a lot of words, but I would really really like to.
I’m also terrified that I’ll have done such a bad job bringing up my children that they won’t want children of their own and I’m desperate to be a Nanna! Literally at 37, desperate to be a Nanna. I’m so paranoid that I’ve influenced my children to never have children of their own.
16.) What is your proudest achievement?
It’s a cliché , but my children. My daughter Joni is 12, she’s incredible. Wilbur is spectacular. I just sit there like seriously what did we do right here?
Outside of being a mum, it’s sticking with things when they get really hard. I have a strong fight or flight, flight response to things; just run for the hills, pretend that didn’t happen! Move on! But I think certainly with work, with First Days and with other projects I’ve done, having that resilience to dig my heels in and stick with things, I’m really proud of, because I think that takes some guts.
For more information visit: www.firstdays.net
Instagram: @firstdays_
Twitter: @Firstdays_
Facebook: FirstDaysCharity
Instagram: @emma_cantrell
Twitter: @emmacantrell_
The Colourful Kind 